intimations of mortality come at strange times
like today sitting on the toilet
remembering, yet again, that one day
this body will be a husk
where will my mind be

i hope that there will be time for reflection
wish that I will get to see people's reactions
be a ghost for a while
would an eternity of hell be
preferable to oblivion

because that is what i expect
a light switch turned off
boom and my mind is gone
no cells to trace itself on
nothing that can have regrets.

argh fallen out of habit. got a new desk the other day with a window seat. quite nice. big building across the way is always interesting to gaze at. good for my eyes too since in this cube i do not look out into the hall as i did in my old one. anyway, i have not idea what the building contains, in terms of business, but it's just kind of weird, interesting that i have this window into lives totally unconnected to mine. course you could say that about a lot of our interactions with people i guess, seeing what people are buying in the way of books, groceries, or clothes. seeing what other people are ordering reading. watching people in their cars. a glimpse, but now connection.